8 Ideas for My Dream Funeral

8 Ideas for My Dream Funeral

     I know that I'm a youngin, somewhat 18ish, I have fantasies of my most important moments such as my wed... funeral! Doesn't everybody fantasize about their funeral? No? Really? Well, why not? I mean, birthdays and holidays are great but they're very predictable and happen all the time, and weddings can happen once but most people have more than one anyways. However, funerals, funerals are special because they only happen once. They commemorate the dead, the life that no longer exists, and it only happens once in a lifetime. It's a special occasion so why not make it the best celebration? Why not let your loved ones remember you for the creative and fun being you were when living? Nobody remembers weddings anyways, but funerals should memorable because they're the reflection of the deceased. That's why I made 8 ideas for my dream funeral:

1. The first thing that I want at my funeral is for every guy to wear a neon blue dress; yes, every guy. And, I don't mean a ballgown. No, I want guys to wear full on cocktail dresses with sparkles and maybe some flashing LED led lights. However, stilettos are optional. I don't really want guys tripping at my funeral.
   
2. The second thing that really has to be at my funeral is the
   HEYYEYAAEYAAAEYAEYAA and "Another One Bites The Dust" to be played by a hologram of Morgan Freeman (since he's probably going to be dead by then (;^;)). To set up the atmosphere for what comes next.
   
3. I want my uncompleted bucket list to be completed on my funeral day, which includes skydiving in Machu Picchu, moose watching, riding a mechanical bull, and more, or everything that I own will go to my dog. 
   
   
   
4. Booze, booze for everyone. What better way to commemorate someone's death than through bottomless vodka shots. Don't worry, you'll forget I ever existed in no time. Who's aunt Abigail? Oh, I don't remember her, wasn't she your nanny?
   
5. The location of my funeral will be in a makeshift batman cave. If it's in a real bat cave, not the comic book one, I'm talking about a real bat cave, then bonus points for my funeral planner.
   
6. I want to be wearing a unicorn suit with a beard in a cheap coffin because I'll probably won't have enough money left for my coffin since I wasted it all on booze for my funeral and all of my money will probably end up going to the dog. Come on, who will skydive with an old dead grandmother? Let's be real.
   
7. The flowers should probably not be black, I would like them to be a genetically manipulated to glow in the dark. They can be any flowers, I really won't care at that point, I'm even fine with weed flowers (not the fun kind). 
   
8. Lastly, I would like at least five dollars to be dedicated to research for a cure for whatever killed me, and if it was stupidity, just remember, there's no cure for stupidity.

     Therefore, I hope that this post has helped you or inspired you to start thinking of the way that you're going to plan out your funeral because it really only happens once; so make it special. What are you waiting for? Plan your funeral now!